I think half of the AFC problem is men taking women at their words and trying to make the object of their affections happy- which makes sense on a topical level; you love someone and you enjoy their company so you want nothing but the positive for them.
This is confusing to the average man. You want nothing but the postive and you act in that direction- so they should appreciate it and reciprocate; but they don’t. That’s what a man would do. This is women we’re dealing with and they’re wired differently.
Saying you’re “trying to make the object of you affections happy” is really Orwellian nice nice talk to hide the truth. Lets rephrase and reveal it for what it is: you’re trying to please her. Not quite their yet…. the naked truth isn’t quite revealed: you’re trying to placate her. That’s what you’re doing when you “try to make her happy”. And what type of man is a man that placates at the expense of his own happiness and welfare- is it a strong man or a weak man?
A weak man of course.
A strong man takes his own interests and desires to heart- if a womans interests run counter to his he acts in his own interests. To a woman’s hindbrain this signals that he is both strong and desirable to the female population- which strengthens her “bond” (aka love) to him. Her biology is compelling her to pursue and stick with him for the purposes of reproduction since his behavioral signalling is telling her that he is of good genetic stock. Conversly the placating male who is “trying to make her happy” is signalling that he is of bad genetic stock/social positioning.
All this dates back to our pre-language evolutionary beginnings and ideas such as religion, philosophy, and politics/political correctness have now altered our natural thought patterns from what they would have been in the absense of language. Simply speaking these three areas function as lingo-pschyological reprogamming that changes the idea of what is “good” for the average male.
In pre-history the “good” was the strong. It lead to social positioning, mating opportunites, and a better life then “weak” who would be victimized and exploited by the strong. (The weak would also attempt to placate the strong to avoid physical damage- which is another reason I believe that placation to a woman is a turn off to women- its indicative of a “placation” personality that is in the habit of sacrificing/placating to other stronger males).
However the big linguo-social reprommers have fliped the script so to speak. “Good” has been substitued by “Moral”. The difference between the two is once again hidden by the terminology. Lets once again rephrase to reveal the truth. What is “Moral”. Most would define it as “the greater good”? And who is that? Everyone but yourself of course!
Moral/Greater good is nothing but placation to everyone but yourself.
Sacrificing for “soceity”- a group of strangers that care nothing for you- is “moral”; you’re giving up your needs/desires/dreams/life for nothing but their praise and high opinion of your morality.
Sacrificing for the wife/woman- an amoral creature who, in the vast majority of cases, who will despise you for the very morality you hold in such high regard!
Sacrificing for religion- again another group of faceless strangers that will gladly accept your donation and use it to give to another group of people- to prove their “morality”.
Everyone and everything is a moral cause…. except for looking out for yourself and your own benefits! Everything is moral except making yourself more power and using it to benefit yourself…. why?
Because the “morality” is the opposite of the “good”. To be benefited by morality you must be weak- you need the sacrifice of the strong; you need to feed off of them like a parasite and morality is nothing but a way to convince them that they’re somehow better off, in someway, for it.
Being strong, rich, powerful, sexually attractive, are all “good”. You need to excel in some fashion to be any of those things. The poor and mediocre are, by defintion, the opposite of “good”. Only by crippling the “good” and defining it as “evil” can they eliminate the rewards of “good” and sieze it for themselves.
I for one am sick of the whining about “morality” online. Grown men are whining for month, no YEARS, on end about the immorality and injustice of the world for not rewarding them for being “Moral” and “Nice”. In reality they’re blinded to the truth. Let us strip away the lies of lingustic deceit and show the truth for what it is. Men want to be rewarded for being “Moral” and “Nice”- in reality want to be rewarded for being mediocre and weak.
“Nice” is the stragegy of the weak man. “Moral” is the psychological refuge of the medicore man. These men, these dandies, want to have the rewards of the strong, rich, and powerful without having to earn them. They want to have the benefits that the “good” have (namely beautiful women who are loyal to them) without having to be “good” and excelling.
They whine about the rich being greedy- and then whine that women are attracted to the rich: yet they refuse to admit that wealth is a sign of intelligence and determination (which is psychological strength). They refuse to admit its a “good”.
They whine that women are attracted to “looks”: yet they refuse to go to the gym and change what they eat/drink. Once again- looks is a “good” that they expect their “morality” (aka weakness) to compensate for.
They whine that women are attracted to jerks/thugs/a-holes- yet they refuse to change their personalities and let people walk all over them. They’re “Nice”- which is really weakness in that they are too psychologically weak to withstand the social pressure that would result from looking after their own interests. If they’re too weak too look after themselves- how can a woman expect that he’ll be able to look after her and the children?
Ultimately- all this boils down to is a break between two menalities.
Neitzche called it the master vs the slave.
In reality it is that of the good vs that of the mediocre.
You can either deny that you’ve been lied to and manipulated into a poisonous thought process where you expect your mediocrity and weakness to be rewarded- and whine when it isn’t.
Or you can change- one day at a time.